Marnie Marnie Macauley

The Singular “Art” of Imperfection


As I deal in relationships, I’m overwhelmed with a nation of people who have adopted “perfection” as the hallmark of our (Jewish) culture. More, too many Jewish people have been made miserable by this exhausting endeavor, which in turn makes me miserable. This month, I’m here to tell you this has got to stop. “PERFECTION”… Read More »

Surviving Work


I think it’s a crime against 18-year-olds to decide what they want to be before who they want to be (especially if it’s “us” who are “deciding”). While there’s often mega discussion of the “what,” there’s little training for the “how” to survive on the job. The work place, much like a family (to quote… Read More »

Wha? Wha? …The Sounds of Silence


My dear San Diegans: Our fabulous editor caught my “admission” of deafness in an earlier column (not to mention the fact that I “Wha? Wha?” her on the phone). So in this column, she asked that I tell you the ganza about living in semi-silence. I rarely talk about it, except to apologize to assorted… Read More »



True, Hanukkah isn’t one of our “biggies” but somehow between my childhood full of Chistmases under the neighbor’s tree to now, political correctness hit Hanukkah in a big way. With that, peace, love and buying out the Toys ‘R Us became a big deal in some Jewish homes. Is it ok to mix and match… Read More »

Plastic Surgery, Yay or Nay?


As vanity is a concern among Jewish scholars, the issue of plastic surgery has undergone much “examination.” Rav Shlomo Zalman Aurbach’s (1920-1995) opinion sums up the consensus of most legal experts: surgery to allow someone to appear normal, and more importantly to view themselves as appearing normal is permitted. Even surgery for an appearance that… Read More »

Grief During the High Holidays


In an ideal world, the High Holidays are an awesome amalgam of joy, reflection and awe. For some, especially seniors, it’s also a time of great sadness. This month, we look at one woman, but this column is dedicated to all who have to face the holidays with empty chairs around them. Dear Marnie: I… Read More »

Career Vs. Commitment


Can career and relationship commitments co-exist? You bet. But it’s often a rocky road and requires being truthful with ourselves. Let’s look. HEARTS AND CRAFTS  Marnie: I’m a 25-year-old woman with serious ambitions. Ever since college I’ve put career over relationships because a.) my career requires me to move every year or so, b.) I’m… Read More »

LGBT Issues in the Wake of Orlando


I believe we Jews have a vested interest in shouting out on behalf of all human beings against the shrill sound, the wafting smell, the ignoble ignorance of persecution and bigotry. This column is dedicated to all the victims and survivors of June 12. BI WAY Marnie: What do you think about gays, lesbians, and… Read More »

To Eat or Not to Eat, Fat is the Question


We Jews adore our families, food, education, food, values, food, Israel, food. And did I mention food? Food for four on a Jewish table could typically feed the entire population of Uruguay. But the general population’s “thin” obsession can call tradition into question. NAKED FEAR DEAR MARNIE: I find myself in an uncomfortable situation. I’m… Read More »

The Art of the Chassenah


WEDDING GUEST WOES DEAR MARNIE: I’m getting married at the end of June and one of my fiancé’s best friends has a girlfriend who I really don’t want to come to the wedding. I don’t think there is any way to ask him not to bring her without making him and my fiancé angry. What… Read More »